Getting better!

January 27/12.

Got sick for 24 hours. Not fun. Didn't allow anyone to take pics in the state I was in, so will just use some
from OTHER days (instead of looking horrible in bed).

(this is NOT what I looked like yesterday, that's for damn sure!)

Here's what happened. Likely all my own doing. So many people have been concerned about my plumeting weight lately (down to 90 pounds), that I decided, OK, I'll just start eating and keep going. Not a wise move. Had perogies and later a big bowl of Shreddies with milk and fresh strawberries. A few hours later, I started to get really cold. Put my coat on and fell asleep on the den couch. Then woke up, shaking and absolutely freezing. Went up to bed, wore a bathrobe over my clothes, was under the Duvet and a big blanket, but NOTHING could stop the shaking. It was insane. Woke Sam up (which I never do), and told him I'm sick. He was thinking about calling an ambulance, but after about an hour, it started to subside a bit.

(I kinda looked like this.....not!  Had more of a half green/half blue hue).

Figured that after the many months of no appetite and then suddenly, piling on the calories - put my body into some kind of shock syndrome. By morning, I was still going in and out of major league cold flashes. My fingers turned white with cold (as it does in Raynaud's syndrome). Looked it up, and Raynaud's is usually related to exposure to cold. Also read this syndrome can be related to stress. (seems EVERYTHING can be related to stress!) At any rate, was very weak all day and spent most of my time in bed, sleeping or reading, (while shaking with cold). Weird or what? (thank you Shatner).

Sam went out and bought me a bunch of cans of Ensure (as recommended by my GP). Had my first one today....chocolate. Man, that stuff is heavy and dense and I'm not used to that at all. But I've promised everyone I'll gain weight, so I'm going to try to keep drinking it.

Maybe that way, I can get back to normal one of these days!

In the meantime, Carrie and I are taking our cousin, Kevan, out for his birthday dinner tonight to a restaurant called Sauvignon.

It will be the first time in our lives we've done this - just the three of us. (the original "stocking kids" as Carrie calls us) - since we spent every Christmas together as kids and ALWAYS opened our big red Santa stockings on the floor, as a team.

We have a lot to talk about. Kev is among the best men I've known in my life! He's like a brother to us, but also, a great friend. Glad I'm feeling better today. Here's to a great evening!!

Follow up

September 14/11.

Nothing like waking up at 10:30 a.m. (after getting just two hours sleep), and suddenly realizing your hospital appointment is scheduled for 10:30 a.m., - and you now have less than 30 seconds to get there! (which of course, is not possible).

That's what happened on Tuesday. Thankfully, I had fallen asleep in my clothes, so was able to grab my gear, jump in the car, rush to Princess Margaret Hospital and arrive just 20 minutes later. Miraculously, the doc I've dubbed "The Nutty Professor" (because he reminds me so much of the Jerry Lewis version of "Julius Kelp" in my fave old comedy), was running late too, so I didn't miss anything!

While there, I ran into a friend in the waiting room and found out she has been battling breast cancer for over a year. In my already shaky and exhausted state, I broke into tears upon hearing her story, (which included the dreaded chemo I had so fortunately avoided). My empathy levels are apparently on major overload. Just couldn't seem to stop crying.

Once in the examination room, the doc checked the surgical site and told me things seem to be coming along fine, but that I have fat necrosis (delightful). Ever since the surgery, I've had this hard area in the right breast - kind of feels the way I imagine an implant would feel! I looked up fat necrosis and this is the description.
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Breast fat necrosis is a lump that forms in the breast due to fat cells that have either been damaged or degenerated. This condition is caused by trauma to the breast. Any type of blow to the breast or fall which results in bruising may further lead to necrosis. Many times the lump will form with a bruising or redness around it. It is also common for patients who have recently undergone a lumpectomy to develop breast necrosis. The same is true for radiation therapy.
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This condition happens more often in obsese women (but I weigh 96 pounds). The doc thinks I should gain some weight. He wants me to buy Ensure. Even hearing THAT kind of had me upset, because it made me remember when doctors advised me I should buy Ensure for my Mum! At any rate, the Nutty Professor gave me a series of follow-up appointments with the radiation oncologist and to have various scans done. Meanwhile, I stay on Tamoxifen for five years and the breast remains sore, and some areas still completely numb, (from the cutting to remove a lymph node), almost five months after surgery.

Since I dashed to the hospital in such a rush, I forgot to bring my camera, so couldn't take any pictures there. (a lucky thing, since I looked like a bedraggled wreck). THIS shot was taken hours later, after a vanilla shower, and the whole hair routine and makeup-applied-in-the-war-room-with-a-garden-trowel. (I am SO low maintenance....NOT!)

Later on in the day, I went back to Aldo, downtown on Yonge Street, to pick up the shoes I ordered. There was only one pair in my size and they had to bring them in from the Scarborough Town Centre store for me to try.

I returned the original ones I had settled on last week, after falling in love with these kick-ass Marilyn Monroe ones. (they were on sale, - 30 percent off and were cheaper than the ones I returned! - WINNING!!) The pic was taken by a lady named Ashley who offered to help me show off the shoes!

Picked up Swiss Chalet takeout on Yonge Street for Sam, Kate, Max and Damian for dinner. Just couldn't seem to bring myself to even fathom the idea of cooking. In fact, I really hate cooking with a passion. (Could I just NOT to do it for the rest of my life please)??

Hey, my horoscope for today says: Your fatigue is high, and you could be overwhelmed by everything that is going on. (gee, ya think?)