Lain's Log

To Infinity and Beyond!!!

October 20/11.

Haven't felt much like writing. The whole "one-year Mum" thing. Hard to believe it's been 365 days.

At 3:45 p.m. (time of death), didn't think I would do ANYTHING to mark the occasion, but at that moment, suddenly wanted to. I brought Mum's ashes upstairs to the bedroom. Max came home from school. I called him up. He had been thinking of her all day too. We sat on the floor, held hands, said a few words about "Gramma", read the poem she wrote about Forget and Remember, aloud. (Her thoughts on the subject of Alzheimer's, just so killer).

The poem was printed on the Celebration of Life cards, created for us by our sweet friend (and family member), Mary Spence-Thomas.

"Forget". "Remember". What a pair.
The two sides of one coin? That's fair.
You flip a coin - "Remember's" up -
So Life's still offering you its cup.
Next flip - "Forget" has won the toss,
Reminding you of "Who's the Boss".
You now must go where THIS guy places -
The land of Dumb? He holds all aces!
"Remember's" trying to recoup;
He wishes he could salvage you.
"Forget" intrudes - "Now come, no tears.
You're mine. Relax. And have no fears."
"Remember" makes his final stance.
"Your life, your work! Recall that dance!"
Your parents, art, and music too -
The laughs you had, the fun - why blue?
The trips, the journeys, great and small -
"Remember" says - MY job was all!
"Forget" sits quiet. "Yes, it's clear.
Of riches, plainly, you've no lack.
I'll pause a while and let you smile
But no mistake - I WILL be back!"

Meanwhile, called Carrie, after Max and I did our thing. She and Lee were having their OWN special moment. They put me on speaker phone, so we could all talk. Carrie & Lee were looking at photos of Mum on the computer. Later, Carrie sent me a photo of herself. She decided to wear Mum's earrings for the occasion. Very pretty. Later that night, she performed in a Bach concert with Tafelmusik and managed to get through it, despite the heavy duty emotion. Mum would have been proud.

In the midst of all this, my amazing cousins, Marilyn and Kevan, delivered a dozen beautiful pink roses to me for my birthday, along with a gorgeous card AND a generous VISA gift card - for future use. (already have special plans for it!)

Once the sad anniversary was over, I didn't feel like mourning anymore. Decided to dress up, be "flouncy" and try to move on. Black lace, sheer stockings, cute skirt, anything to pick up my spirits. Mum would have wanted that.

Get ready to party! (she ALWAYS loved a party!)

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