Lain's Log

Like Wow Man!!!!!!!! Trippy

July 29/11.

I have a friend, who always makes me laugh when I ask a question,
and the answer comes back, "I got nothin'." LOVE that response. SO funny to me. Mainly because I can relate. But almost always, this same friend says, moments later, "I got somethin'!" Just takes a pause and a little thinking! Same thing happens to me.

Check out the new floaty pastel coloured shorty dress for a hot day on the radiation table. I'm really into floaty. (and new pink shoes too! Have never had pink shoes before!!) My friend, Joanne, was my "construction worker photog" today. Thanks Joanne! For EVERYTHING! SO much fun to have you along with me at the hospital. Treatments were never this fun before!! Conversation is NEVER dull with Joanne around. She is truly a riot. Love you Babe.

Joanne is cottage-bound, but we had a blast while she was in Toronto. See you again for a few more days when you get back!

Today's "Where's my stylist?" shot. Was feeling white lace & ruffles. Don't know why. So, ruffle city, under the ever-lovely medical gown. Added a beret from the Auntie Ray collection, and there you have it. (I know. Thankfully, only two more days. What will I do for an encore???) LOL.

Went into radiation, the technicians did their usual thing, measurements, green squiggly laser lines on the ceiling, shifting me this way and that on the table. All the while, my brain was ignoring them, shuffling thru various backdrops and locations, trying to determine where I could go for today's "table top fantasy escape". But, to quote my friend, "I got nothin'."

No matter how hard I tried, nothin'. OK. So, BLANK screen today gang!
But, I was wrong.

As always, just as things are about to get rolling, somebody says to me, "OK Elaine. We're ready to go," and they leave the room. I am all alone. Suddenly, I hear these weird musical notes. Hear them every day. (but forgot to TALK about them, till now).

I'm lying there, arm stuck over my head in this weird contraption, - then, the sound that indicates the start of the treatment.

Big Ben!!
Can you believe, the sound is the chimes of Big Ben? Arguably the most famous sound of London!

Here it is. Bong! Bong! Bong! Bong! (pause). Bong! Bong! Bong! Bong!
Then - zap city, and my brain is off, someplace else.

Click here to hear it

As soon as I heard these Big Ben chimes today, I was suddenly transported to London, listening to the clock and standing in the middle of Trafalgar Square, surrounded by hundreds of pigeons!!

I'd been there once, when my parents took me, at the age of just shy of 4. There's a cute pic somewhere, of me, standing, feeding pigeons, but I've never had an actual memory of being there.

Many years later, as an adult, I had the chance to return to London a couple of times. Went back to Trafalgar Square, seriously wondering if I could recall ANYTHING of having been there at age 4. I didn't. But, I tried to recreate the childhood photo.

April, 1989 - Have to laugh, looking at the crazy kerchief and raincoat!! Stylish.

ANYWAY...back to London. In this table top fantasy, I was alone, throwing food to the birds. I was the age I am now. But then, unexpectedly, I was a little, 4-year-old kid, standing in the midst of all these birds, a little scared and then, my PARENTS were there with me. My Mum seemed to be in the background, but I could clearly see my DAD!! He was out of our lives since shortly after that trip to England.

While on the table, I realized this memory felt REAL, not just conjured up from an old photograph. I was there with him. (cue Twilight Zone theme).

Without warning, on the table, my stomach went into one of those knots when you're about to sob. I actually moved on the table, muscles tightened and shifted,(or it FELT that way), and I thought I might have caused a problem with the radiation. My eyes were closed and I could feel tears. I opened my eyes to try and stop the visions, the tears, by seeing the reality of a radiation zapper above me, but it didn't help. Tears still coming. My Dad didn't say a word. Man, these "fantasy trips" are becoming a bit too real. Like hypnosis. Without hypnosis. - Thankfully, only two left!!!!

Anyway, #14? Yep. OUTTA there.

Joanne took the "adios shot" outside Princess Margaret Hospital. (I think my security guard was jealous).

I need to call my Dad and tell him about this wild memory. He will laugh. (or, knowing Dad, maybe cry...wonder where I got this emotional streak?? LOL)

So there you have it gang.

Table top fantasy #14. Whew. Too much reality.

(might be a GOOD thing there are only two more treatments left!!)

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