Lain's Log: Christmas Daze

December 23/11.

Almost Christmas.
Not a single gift bought. No food purchased. Nothing cooked.
As Santa says in the old TV special Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, "We'll have to CANCEL Christmas!" (Such is the life of an elf).

Then, all of a sudden, things change, the red nose steers Santa into place and everything is golden. (Miracles CAN happen I suppose)!

My son, Max, helped me pack up all the canned goods collected during the carolling party the other night, to take them over to the Broadview/Danforth Loblaws food drive. I was happy about the contribution, but feeling down about other things. Tough to concentrate on Christmas.

One neighbour donated $5 on carolling night. Upon arrival at Loblaws, I decided to use the cash towards their "Extra Helping" cause. You pay five dollars to buy a box of PC Blue Menu macaroni and cheese, and the store will put together a package of nutritious, non-perishable food (including the box of mac & cheese) for the local food bank. All you do is pick up a box, pay for it at the counter, drop it in the collection bin and the store takes care of the rest. (It brought tears to my eyes when Max promptly opened his wallet and paid $5 of his own because he wanted to help out too).

Following the Loblaws visit, Max took off to visit his girlfriend, Robyn, while I went to see my family doctor. I've been frightened for the past two weeks by the unexpected return of breast pain. (The exact pain that hit me this past February just before the diagnosis of breast cancer). My next follow-up appointment with my breast surgeon, Dr. David McCready at Princess Margaret Hospital, isn't till late January. He advised I see my GP, so I did.

In the words of my late friend, Patrick Spence-Thomas (and the Monty Python gang), "Always look on the bright side of life"! Trying to. My Doc tells me she can certainly feel the lump I'm referring to, - (which may only be scar tissue), but when I asked her to please file her findings/report on to the hospital, she asked, "Well, who would I SEND it to?" Filled with anguish, I sighed, and suggested, "Hmmmmmmmmm, perhaps, could it be, the SURGEON?? Dr. McCready"?

Reminded me exactly of that line from Dana Carvey as Church Lady on SNL, "Could it be...............SATAN???"

My Doc responded she wouldn't do that and I should just go home, take Tylenol for the pain and wait for my appointments at Princess Margaret. I explained that yes, I can take Tylenol, but that's not my concern. I want to know the REASON for the return of the pain. Is it a recurrence? She told me to come back and see her in a week. In the meantime, I've also received confirmation of a new years appointment with radiation oncologist, Dr. Koch to check on things. Makes for a scary holiday season. On top of that, I've been so caught up in the drama of my close friend (who wants to remain anonymous), after a horribly traumatic fall from a rooftop, which caused severe injuries. Today is homecoming day, which I'm happy and relieved to hear. I'm thinking of you and praying for a speedy recovery.

On the drive home, I was kinda dazed.

I just Twilight-Zoned out on colourful Christmas lights, trying to blot everything from my mind.

Thank God for family and some very special friends who've helped me cope, one drama-filled day at a time.
(You know who you are)!

Somehow, you always manage to keep me smiling when the going gets rough.

When I got home, decided to do just what THIS doctor (meaning ME), ordered! Laughter is the BEST medicine, right??